Parshat Toldot and who are the bad guys

 Who are the good guys and bad guys in this weeks parsha?

Just looking at the pasukim alone, Yitchak and Yaakov come across as not the most ehrlich....

Ok, Esav was a hunter but it seems like he got positive reinforcement from his father; who loved him mostly because of his hunting skills(as per the pasuk). Yitzchak doesn't see too impressive either, with his stomach dictating who and what he loves...In fact, why is Esav such a bad guy for willing to sell his bechor while starving; when his father was also willing to "give up" the blessings, to the one that fed him what he liked to eat...?

At the same time, it's true that Yaakov dwelled in tents(not sure why that is considered a compliment)but still teamed up with his mother to steal the blessings of the bechor. Seems like this was common in Rivkah's family, where Lavan swapped the older with the younger when marrying them off (reverse of what Rivka did with Yaakov and Esav). 

Then you have Yaakov outright lying to his father (where emes is normally the virtue required for getting close to God). I know the mepharshim try to explain that Yaakov really didn't lie. By the fact that they had to defend Yaakov, says it all...

Finally, Yaakov leaves to Lavan, pretty much broke(as opposed to Eliezer who left to find a wife for Yitchak, with a wealthy war chest). The aggadah even creates the story of Eliphaz chasing Yaakov to help explain the lack of wealth/gifts. 

I would like to hypothesize that maybe the  family lived in extreme poverty, thus the extreme hunger on both the part of Esav and Yitzchak.  That is why Esav 's hunting skills was so appreciated and why Yaakov left with no gifts or wealth to seek out a mate.

In fact, unlike eliezer, Yaakov was told exactly where to go, to find a wife. That's because, only family would be willing to marry off a poor nephew/cousin. On the other hand when Eliezer had the wealth of Avraham at his disposal, the entire land was open for a potential mate for Yitzchak. 

I will bring down both pasukim and compare the two...

By instructions of Avraham to eliezer-

כִּ֧י אֶל־אַרְצִ֛י וְאֶל־מוֹלַדְתִּ֖י תֵּלֵ֑ךְ וְלָקַחְתָּ֥ אִשָּׁ֖ה לִבְנִ֥י לְיִצְחָֽק׃

" but will go to the land of my birth and get a wife for my son Isaac.”

By Yitzchak instructions to Yaakov (this weeks parsha)

ק֥וּם לֵךְ֙ פַּדֶּ֣נָֽה אֲרָ֔ם בֵּ֥יתָה בְתוּאֵ֖ל אֲבִ֣י אִמֶּ֑ךָ וְקַח־לְךָ֤ מִשָּׁם֙ אִשָּׁ֔ה מִבְּנ֥וֹת לָבָ֖ן אֲחִ֥י אִמֶּֽךָ׃

" Up  go to Paddan-aram, to the house of Bethuel, your mother’s father, and take a wife there from among the daughters of Laban, your mother’s brother."

I noticed something interesting in the above pasuk. You have the exact reversal of God's command to Avraham of parshat לך לך. In fact the actual words לך לך are even written in this pasuk- קום לך and וקח לך.

Just like Avraham left everything to follow God's command, so did Yaakov abandon everything to follow his father's command.

Perhaps as a result, Yaakov had more in common with his grandfather than his own father. Could this be why in next weeks parsha the pasuk says 

וְהִנֵּ֨ה יְהֹוָ֜ה נִצָּ֣ב עָלָיו֮ וַיֹּאמַר֒ אֲנִ֣י יְהֹוָ֗ה אֱלֹהֵי֙ אַבְרָהָ֣ם אָבִ֔יךָ וֵאלֹהֵ֖י יִצְחָ֑ק הָאָ֗רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֤ר אַתָּה֙ שֹׁכֵ֣ב עָלֶ֔יהָ לְךָ֥ אֶתְּנֶ֖נָּה וּלְזַרְעֶֽךָ׃

And standing beside him was יהוה, who said, “I am יהוה, the God of your father Abraham’s [house] and the God of Isaac’s [house]: the ground on which you are lying I will assign to you and to your offspring.

Notice the strange language of אברהם אביך when יצחק was the actual father...

This could be confirming the destiny and adventure of the Jewish people that started with the לך לך of Avraham and was now being  consummated, with the לך לך of Yaakov. 

In fact both Avraham and Yaakov, shared the destiny of God changing their names. That's what happens when you uproot and abandon everything; you reinvent yourself.  Perhaps this was a form of teshuva that Yaakov did for the misdeeds of lying and being deceitful.  That is why the first time that Yaakov receives prophecy is when he is in exile.

This reminds me of the Rambam in Hilchot teshuva -(notice in the English "b" through "f")

ב,ה  [ד] מִדַּרְכֵי הַתְּשׁוּבָה לִהְיוֹת הַשָּׁב צוֹעֵק תָּמִיד לִפְנֵי ה', בִּבְכִי וּבְתַחֲנוּנִים, וְעוֹשֶׂה צְדָקָה כְּפִי כּוֹחוֹ, וּמִתְרַחֵק הַרְבֵּה מִן הַדָּבָר שֶׁחָטָא בּוֹ.  וּמְשַׁנֶּה שְׁמוֹ, כְּלוֹמַר שֶׁאֲנִי אַחֵר וְאֵינִי אוֹתוֹ הָאִישׁ שֶׁעָשָׂה אוֹתָן הַמַּעֲשִׂים; וּמְשַׁנֶּה מַעֲשָׂיו כֻּלָּן לְטוֹבָה, וּלְדֶרֶךְ יְשָׁרָה.  וְגוֹלֶה מִמְּקוֹמוֹ--שֶׁגָּלוּת מְכַפֶּרֶת עָווֹן, מִפְּנֵי שֶׁגּוֹרֶמֶת לוֹ לְהִכָּנַע וְלִהְיוֹת עָנָו וּשְׁפַל רוּחַ.

"Among the paths of repentance is for the penitent to

a) constantly call out before God, crying and entreating;

b) to perform charity according to his potential;

c) to separate himself far from the object of his sin;

d) to change his name, as if to say "I am a different person and not the same one who sinned;"

e) to change his behavior in its entirety to the good and the path of righteousness; and f) to travel in exile from his home. Exile atones for sin because it causes a person to be submissive, humble, and meek of spirit."